Easy Sugar Cookie Recipe or ‘We’ll Call It A Draw With The Final Score Being: Kitchen 1, Me 1′

Honestly, when I started this blog I fully intended to unleash my inner geek, post witty reviews on films, games, gadgets and gizmos, and become more comfortable with blogging and social media methods, but then the unforeseen happened and I got married, moved 4k miles from my homeland and took on the challenge of being a wife, chef, homemaker and best friend.  Now my posts seem to be more concerned with the huge learning curve of living in a new country and being a wife, more interested in the things unique to Florida and also with the everyday things commonplace to Americans but which represent world of wonder to me.

Today I decided to try my hand at baking, specifically cookies (in the UK we would refer to cookies as biscuits, but I’m not going to start a potato/potahto, tomato/tomahto debate right now).

I found a recipe that looked suspiciously quick and easy on AllRecipes.com, and decided that I’d give it a go.

Easy Sugar Cookie Recipe
Prep Time: 15mins, Cook Time: 8-10mins, Ready In: 25mins
Should make approximately 40-50 cookies depending on how large you make your dough balls in Stage 2

Ingredients:
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 cup butter, softened
1 1/2 cups white sugar
1 egg
1 teaspoon vanilla extract (I chose to us 2 teaspoons and the result was a strong yet not overpowering vanilla taste)
When I next make these cookies I’m going to add a generous handful, or even a 1/2 cup, of dessicated coconut as when I nibbled on the cookies although they were delicious I felt something was missing and, after wondering if chocolate chips, marshmallows or nuts would improve them, decided that simply dried coconut would give it a touch of something special.

Instructions:
1)   Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). In a small bowl, stir together flour, baking soda, and baking powder. Set aside.
2)   In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar until smooth. Beat in egg and vanilla. Gradually blend in the dry ingredients. Roll rounded teaspoonfuls of dough into balls, and place onto ungreased cookie sheets.
3)   Bake 8 to 10 minutes in the preheated oven, or until golden. Let stand on cookie sheet two minutes before removing to cool on wire racks.

Sounds easy?  Well, it was.  Until I got to the 3rd step where I had to put my trays of dough balls into the hot oven.  I put on my super sturdy oven gloves, I firmly grabbed my cookie trays and I gently and carefully pushed the tray forward into the oven.  Unfortunately, as I am the Queen of All Muppets I didn’t keep an eye on my distance from the side of the oven and as I slid the final baking tray into the oven I moved my right forearm forward and made firm, undeniable contact with the hot metal frame.

White hot pain, followed by shocked numbness.

Ever the professional, I closed the oven, set the timer and then went to run my arm under a cold tap.  Honestly it’s the least sexy my arm has ever looked, a horrible burn mark about 2 inches long and in the middle about 1cm wide, and is going to leave the most horrible burn scar imaginable once I get the disgusting blistering and then scabbing parts out of the way.  Which is perfect timing for us going into summer and me being unable to cover up my arm without looking like a mummified freak, as absolutely no one is going to wear long sleeves with all this hot, sunny weather.

*sigh*

On the upside my cookies came out absolutely amazingly: crispy outside and soft, fluffy and buttery inside, completely perfect.  So I now have a tin of delicious homemade cookies to help me get through this dark time of self-reflection and embarrassment.  In fact, after The Hublet forgets my attempt to kill myself and allows me near the oven again, I’m going to make these sugar cookies once more but next time will put a generous helping of dessicated coconut into my mixture (as I noted in the ingredients above) as I really feel they would benefit from the addition.

Please remember ladies and gents, if you attempt this easy-to-follow recipe you will almost definitely be rewarded with gorgeous cookies, BUT don’t forget to keep an eye on your forearms and the sides of the oven and avoid being a complete donkey like me.

Bracing For Beryl

Subtropical Storm Beryl is approaching North Florida as I type, bringing wet doom with her.  I believe we already know my thoughts on the ridiculously elderly names being given to Hurricanes and Storms, so will say no more on the matter.

Beryl has proven to be a naughty little sausage as she’s a subtropical storm that formed up in the North and has then proceeded to move South, going against the norm of ST Storms forming down South and then travelling up.

Jacksonville’s location nestled in the curve of the North Floridas armpit enjoys a fairly privileged spot, being nicely sheltered and therefore protected from most of the extreme weather that sweeps on by to hit areas further up the coast, but this just means that when one overcomes the obstacles to make a hit it’s usually pretty awful.

We’re about to make a run to the supermarket, not to panic buy I can assure you, however we will be buying a generous amount of bottled water, canned goods and, if I can have my way, an emergency stockpile of cake…here’s hoping.

This is my first ST Storm, and I’m honestly a little apprehensive as although they may not be as horrible as hurricanes they do bring with them a huge amount of rain and very strong winds.  As long as I know where the cat is (probably already hiding under the bed) I’m sure it’ll be ok.

All the best to those of you getting ready to face Beryl’s wrath, and to all of you located in safer areas please get ready to send Cookie Baskets post-Beryl to help us get through this traumatic time (again, it’s worth a try).

Stay dry everyone x

Desmond Hatchett Fathers 30 Children With 11 Women…& Wants A Break From Child Support

First things first: Desmond Hatchett if you happen to read this during all the free time you have while behind bars for yet again failing to pay child support, please click this link for a list of Vasectomy Doctors in Tennessee.

It’s news like this which is guaranteed to get everyone’s heart rate skipping with frustrated anger, but sadly Desmond Hatchett demonstrates an unfortunately common attitude towards parenthood: lack of planning, preparation or accountability.

He’s making the news this month because this inept 30-year-old has fathered a grand total of 30 children with 11 women, and due to his history of minimum wage jobs has been consistently unable to pay sufficient child support to his baby mamas, putting him back in court this month with his hat in hand, begging for the state to cut him some slack and help him out.  Desmond is a high school graduate and, in his minimum wage job, makes approx. $6.50 per hour, bringing his monthly income to approx. $930.  The government rules that up to 50% of his paycheck can go towards child support, but with him flipping burgers/filling grocery bags/wearing silly costumes & directing traffic to Mattress Sales, that works out to a fairly pathetic $2 per month per child.

This has resulted in him making numerous trips to jail on the charges of failing to pay up, and he’s decided that someone should be paying for his children’s welfare…just apparently not him.

Back in 2009, numerous papers reported that Desmond Hatchett had fathered 20-21 children with 11 different mothers and at the time had been called to court to answer for 15 of his 21 children who hadn’t received child support in a while.  Tennessee officials back then had been trying to do what Desmond had never bothered to, and work out how a man earning minimum wage could support 21 children.

Unfortunately, due to his low income, there was no way that he could, and Tennessee taxpayers have had to make up the shortfall, and although back in 2009 Desmond was quoted as saying that he was done with having kids and had never intended to have that many children, explaining it away as, “It just happened,” Desmond has managed to add a further 9-10 children to that figure in just 3-years!

It just happened…

What a childish, immature attitude to take after fathering 21 children with 11 women.  I can understand a man becoming a father for the first time after forgetting to use protection, and explaining it to his family with the words, “It just happened,” but, Desmond Hatchett, we all know that you don’t just trip, fall and impale a women on your manhood 30 times by accident.  At some point you should have stopped and thought, “Hmmm, can I afford to continue doing this?” or, “Am I really in a good place to be a provider and role model to the kids I’ve already had, maybe I should stop.“

Or maybe Desmond viewed his prolific fathering of children as some sort of badge of pride, that instead of thinking, “People are going to think I’m the biggest kind of idiot for having all these kids and completely failing as a father and provider,” he imagines in his warped little mind that, “Wow, all these children must mean I am amazing, women are clearly going to want to get with me and men are going to want to be me for I am obviously The Man and have dynamite between my legs.”

Or perhaps his approach was, “I was stupid enough to father 21 children by 11 women by the time I was 29, and although I didn’t want to be a man and take responsibility for my actions how dare the state refuse to bail me out and let me keep more of my money for myself instead of paying it to my dependents, so I’m going to defy them by staying in a minimum wage job, fathering thousands more babies and add more of a financial drain to taxpayers who are already paying for my mistakes.  Screw you state.”

I’ve had enough with hearing news stories reporting on his fertility being so astronomically amazing.  It WASN’T his fertility that resulted in 30 children, it was his refusal to use contraceptives and his refusal to sit down like an adult and consider whether or not he and his 11 partners, who clearly are not with him in serious, committed relationships, were in a good financial position to take on the responsibility of having (more) children.

Let’s not forget the ladies here as these 11 women – and a round of applause for the Tennessee lovelies who between them popped out 9-10 children between 2009 and now – are the same 11 women who up until 2009 had already born Desmond Hatchett 20-21 children and were chasing him for child support.  These women, who were already being financially neglected by Desmond Hatchett, still allowed him to go ahead and do his thing and give them more babies.  I’m sure that there’s a Planned Parenthood in Tennessee, and even a child knows that contraceptives don’t just mean condoms, so if these 11 women weren’t able to afford to raise a combined total of 30 children then why aren’t we getting on their case for failing to seek family planning advice in order to manage their respective situations.

I’m sure that Tennessee officials – and no doubt officials in states across America – sometimes wish that compulsory sterilisation was an option as clearly there are people who don’t deserve the honour of being parents.

On the one hand, we have couples who hold off on having children for a few years until financially they feel that they’re ready to support a child; those who get their situation stabilized in preparation for a child, only to discover that one or both of them have fertility problems; women who delay being Mothers while they pursue a well-paying career in order to ensure that they have the financial stability to care for a child in their more mature years.

Then on the other hand you have people like Dingleberry Hatchett and his army of Baby Mama’s who have no problem with popping out baby after baby with no regard for that baby’s care or future, and although they showed no maturity or responsibility when making the decision to have children, and refused to invest/waste their own money on birth control, they seem perfectly content with expecting tax payers to foot the bill for child support.

Desmond Hatchett was not thinking with his head when he made the decision to unleash lil’ Hatchett on the female population of Tennessee without wearing a hat.  Getting temporary sexual gratification is one thing, but not thinking ahead to the emotional and financial responsibility that you will bear for any children that you father is just stupid.

Although Desmond claims to know the name and birth date of each of his 30 children (because I’m sure his Baby Mama’s create quite a fuss reminding him to pay out for presents or a party), how on earth was he planning on providing a fatherly role model to them.  There’s no way he can fairly divide his time between 11 houses and 30 children, so how on earth are people like Desmond Hatchett preventing the vicious circle of young men and women being raised in homes without both parents, who are statistically more likely to not finish school, end up claiming welfare or even go to prison.

Did Desmond Hatchett himself come from a traditional nuclear family of 2 parents and 2 children, growing up with a father setting a good example on what a Dad should be?  Or was Desmond Hatchett the product of his own destiny, a faceless man who treated fatherhood as a joke and didn’t teach his son anything about being a man and being accountable for your actions.

Desmond and his army of Baby Mama’s can in no way claim to love their children wholeheartedly as they actively chose to give them life and put them into a situation where they are disadvantaged from day one.  Life is going to be a struggle for those 30 children whose mothers receive no more than $2 per month from their father for their individual care.  If you truly loved your child you would not make the decision to bring them into a negative situation and stack the odds against them clawing their way out from under layers of disadvantage, and they would represent more to you than simply a welfare payment.

Desmond Hatchett and his Baby Mama’s between them demonstrate a fast-growing attitude towards parenthood that has horrible implications for the next few generations.  It shows men have no respect for the traditional roles of Fathers and Providers, and women have no respect for their own wombs or for the traditional roles of Mothers and Nurturers.

We need to stop ignoring the common occurrence of people in disadvantaged situations failing to make responsible, adult decisions and showing accountability for their lives, expecting welfare, the state and ultimately taxpayers to literally pay for their mistakes and ignorance/stupidity, because until we do people like Desmond Hatchett will continue to abuse the system, and many, many more children than his mere 30 will be caught in this horrible circle of negativity.

James Bond: Skyfall Teaser Trailer Released

I”m at home wrapped up in a blanket in a little ball of self-pity, feeling thoroughly rotten with my immune system fighting off something horrible.  I’ve been trying to decide if I have the energy to watch Chronicle or not for the last 30mins, then and decided to delay my decision by wasting a little more time catching up on the latest news around the world.  I was really happy to find that an official teaser trailer for the latest James Bond film, Skyfall, has been released and is being received with glee.

This 23rd Bond film has been dogged by problems, with production coming to a halt in 2010 when MGM, the films distributor, hit financial problems.  Thankfully MGM came out of its red spell in December 2010, and in January 2012 we were given a release date for November 2012.  The brief plot synopsis we’ve been given is, “James Bond’s loyalty to M is challenged over secrets from her past. When MI6 is attacked, it falls to Bond to seek out and eliminate the threat regardless of the cost to himself,” and along with regulars Daniel Craig and Dame Judi Dench, it’s been confirmed that Javier Bardem (as the main villain Raoul Silva), Ralph Fiennes (as possible current or ex government agent Gareth Mallory), Naomie Harris (as field agent Eve), Bérénice Marlohe (as Bond girl Sévérine), Albert Finney (as Kincade), Rory Kinnear (as Bill Tanner, the MI6 Chief of Staff), Ben Whishaw (as Q, making a surprising appearance after being excluded from Casino Royale and The Quantum of Solace), Helen McCrory (as politician Clair Dowar) and others.

The trailer looks good, opening with a shot of Bond standing in front of a London skyline, Big Ben in the background.  We hear a voice over of an unknown man saying the word, “Country,” followed by Bond replying, “England.”  It then cuts to a shot of a man jogging alone through an apparently empty London park, with the man’s voice returning to say, “Gun,” to which Bond replies, “Shot.”  The trailer moves to a scene of silhouetted Bond in a doorway, with the voice over prompting, “Agent,” with Bond replying, “Provocateur,” in possibly a nod to his characters connection with women and frilly underwear.  We see a shot of a gallery target, with the man saying, “Murder,” with trailer cutting to a scene of Bond sitting at an interrogation table, with us viewing Bond from behind the one-way glass looking into the room. He faces a bespectacled man with a pile of files and papers, and Bond retorts, “Employment.”

The interrogator/psychiatrist then says, “Skyfall,” and we cut to a close-up of Bond’s face inter spaced with what appears to be a flashback scene of a man holding a gun standing over another man slumped (shot or dead?) in an armchair, cutting back to Bond’s face and then to Judi Dench (M), Ralph Fiennes (Gareth Mallory) and another agent watching the scene intently from behind the one-way glass, with Mallory turning his head sideways to view an impassive M.  The man prompts Bond by repeating, “Skyfall,” and Bond snarls back, “Done,” and gets up and leaves the room, shooting a glare at the one-way glass as he does so.

The trailer then ups the tempo with a collection of dramatic shots of the Shanghai skyline at night, a beautiful women standing in a blown-out window, Bond shooting his gun, a row of coffins draped with the British flag, Bond running down a London road, helicopters, more shooting and men running and falling, M with Bond (?) viewed from behind surveying a mist-strewn valley, a ‘Not in Service’ London tube train crashing through a wall, a man (Raoul Silva?) walking towards camera with a burning building behind him, the logo for Skyfall with Bond’s voiceover saying, “Some men are coming to kill us…” interspaced with Bond clearly preparing himself for battle, then cutting to Bond continuing to someone off-camera, “We’re going to kill them first,” and lots more exciting action scenes with things exploding (including a poor, defenceless silver Volkswagen), men fighting underwater and more booming, banging, shooting scenes.

“Dundedun dun dun dun dundedun dun dun dun dundedun dun dun dun dundedun dun dun dun deDON Do do do…badap ba daa ba da daa ba daa da deda daa badap ba daa ba da daa ba daa da deda daa.”

Don’t pretend you’re not excited, this is going to be great.  I was a huge convert to the revamped James Bond when it launched in cinemas with a refreshing lack of camp, cheesy one-liners, and ridiculously unbelievable gadgets.  I embraced the new craggy-faced and blonde Bond over the slightly sickly-smooth brunette Bond’s that had come before him.  Daniel Craig delivered, and although the revamp was heavy on the product placements like most of the Bond films that had preceded it, it was clearly heavily influenced by grittier action films like the Bourne franchise, and it was obvious that they were trying to return to the original Bond as envisioned in Ian Fleming’s original novels: more action, more spying activity, less CGI.

I’ve now used up more than enough time transcribing the Skyfall trailer into words, instead of just posting a link to the official trailer site with the command to Watch This Now, and am going to go and slurp some soup, rearrange my blanket nest and try to fall asleep to something a little more soothing than Chronicle.  Sweet dreams all.

Soundgarden (Live To) Rise Again

Yeah I know, it’s a really obvious post title but my brain’s a little melty today and I just couldn’t think of anything smarter than unintelligently playing around with my subject matter.

One of the nicest surprises about recent film The Avengers was the audio appearance of Soundgarden with a new song that’s their first in waaaaaay too long.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed the sounds of super group Audioslave, and yet for me something was missing from the chemistry and personally they didn’t set my world on fire.

Soundgarden officially parted ways on April the 9th 1997 (but still managed to push through a greatest hits compilation album called A-Sides in November of that same year), with the members drifting off to pursue their own interests and projects (most notably lead singer Chris Cornell in 2001 taking on another vocal spot, joining members of recently disbanded Rage Against The Machine to form Audioslave).

In January 2010 Cornell revealed that Soundgarden were getting back together, posting on Twitter, “The 12-year break is over and school is back in session. Sign up now. Knights of the Soundtable ride again!” and although they spent the next few months building a fan frenzy with live performances and numerous re-releases of past classics, in September 2010 they released an album entitled Telephantasm: A Retrospective, which was basically another compilation album of past hits along with one previously unreleased song, but still no new work.

In February 2011 the band shared the news that they had started recording songs for a new album, consisting of mainly new songs and some reworkings of past ideas.  The album was hinted at being released in 2011, although that sadly failed to materialise.  I never object to a bands spending a little longer than planned on an album as I’d rather they be happy with the end result (although let us not speak of Metallica’s St Anger or Guns N’ Roses Chinese Democracy).

Finally, they told fans that a brand new song called Live To Rise from their upcoming unnamed album would feature on The Avengers soundtrack called Avengers Assemble, although they have not yet revealed a release date for the album itself.  They have (unsurprisingly) revealed plans to release yet another compilation of old work, with a box set called Classic Album Selection getting an European release.

To be honest, I don’t care what they do or what they release (and re-release over and over) as I absolutely love Soundgarden and have no problem with them returning to past ideas or songs and improving them where they see fit.  After hearing Live to Rise both in The Avengers film and on download (legal and paid), I can’t wait to get my hands on their new album whenever they get around to perfecting it, no matter how many releases they squeeze in between then and now.

Attention You Filthy Beasts Of Meat & Hair, InvaderCon 2012 Approaches!

In March 2011 something unspeakably terrible happened at the Marriott Century Center in Atlanta GA.  Approximately 1,000 people in a variety of disguises descended upon that fair city for InvaderCon, celebrating the 10-year anniversary of Invader Zim, a cartoon that was initially overlooked by a lot of viewers but eventually generated a huge following, created by Jhonen Vasquez (responsible for comics such as Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, and spin-offs Squee! and I Feel Sick featuring characters from JTHM) that was produced and broadcast by Nickelodeon.

Due to a fall in ratings after the first season, Nickelodeon pulled the show midway through season two.  In the years that followed, due to it gathering a cult following around itself, Nickelodeon aired the remaining episodes and have subsequently put out reruns of the show, resulting in them becoming the second highest-rated show on the network.  Despite the above-average DVD sales figures, huge spin-off merchandise sales and rerun popularity, Nickelodeon have sadly not talked with Jhonen about creating more seasons, deeming them too expensive to make.

The cartoon follows the story of Zim, an alien from the planet Irk.  He and his fellow Irkens are born and raised to be an invader species, with the goal of complete universe domination.  Upon being deemed worth of Invader status, an Irken is assigned a planet and given whatever technological supplies they might need to travel there, discreetly establish themselves and work on assuming control of the inhabitants.  Once a planet has been successfully overthrown by an invader, a fleet of Irken spaceships arrive to complete the conquest, enslaving the planets inhabitants and designating the planet with a new purpose that supports the Irken goal (some planets serve as huge intergalactic food courts, others are nothing more than colossal parking spaces for spaceships).

Even though our antihero Zim has the hardcore invader mentality, he’s cursed with always screwing up, being single-handedly responsible for the near destruction of Irk during Operation Impending Doom I, one of the first plans for mass synchronized universe conquest.

The Irken leaders organise a convention in order to reveal their plans for Operation Impending Doom II, but in this instance they decide to assign Zim to the mysterious planet ? which turns out to be Earth and is located at the absolute furthest reaches of known Irken space.  It has never been conquered by the Irkens as it was deemed valueless, and therefore the leaders assume that sending Zim so far away will minimise his chances of sabotaging another Operation.  They overcome Zim’s doubts and convince him that his mission is of the highest importance, with the entire Irken population celebrating his departure.

Each invader is given a SIR (Standard-issue Information Retrieval) robot who is designed to assist with information gathering and conquest, however Zim being deemed unworthy of decent resources is given GIR, a defective robot made from junk parts, with a hyperactive, disobedient nature and, upon arriving on Earth, a huge love of junk food and cartoons.

Once Zim arrives on Earth we discover a planet that, although technologically advanced, is inhabited for the most part by dumb humans and filled with stereotypes and generalisations.  We meet Zim’s nemesis, a young boy named Dib with a huge intellect who is outcast by his fellow humans, and therefore his warnings that an alien is among them go ignored.  Dib makes it his goal to thwart Zim, and hilarious high jinks ensue.

InvaderCon was the first of its kind, gathering fans of the cartoon from all over the world.  It was initially meant to be a one-time event, with the organisers categorically stating as much, however due to the overwhelming fan support and pleadings for a followup event, they decided to do the one-time only event one more time, and made the bold decision that if they were going to go ahead with a sequel they had to make it bigger and better than last time.

This year, on July the 28th and 29th, InvaderCon II: Doomcon is occurring in Los Angeles CA.  They offer day or weekend tickets, and additional tickets to attend either a Dinner featuring some of the event’s celebrity guests, or a Waffle Breakfast also boasting celebrity attendees.  This year boasts the same celebrity guest lineup as the 2011 InvaderCon (cast members Andy Berman (the voice of Dib), Richard Horvitz (VO Zim), Melissa Fahn (VO Gaz, Dib’s little sister) and Rikki Simons (VO Gir) as well as writer Eric Truehart, with this year having the exciting additions of character designer Aaron Alexovich, production supervisor Jason Stiff and Jhonen Vasquez himself!

There is always a costume contest, and I cannot wait to see some of the offerings from this years attendees.

Although I’m not able to attend this year, I’m hoping that, true to form, there will be another one-time only event yet another time in the future as I know there a few friends in the UK who will be most interested in coordinating a holiday in America with an InvaderCon visit.

A Tip Of The Cap To You, Little London Observationist

In addition to attempting to write my own blog, I follow a few blogs from others that I’ve chosen for content that’s either funny, geeky, informative, nostalgic, on-trend or heavily features cupcakes.  However, an automatic smile springs to my face whenever I receive a post update from Stephanie Sadler, aka the 10+ year career blogger who’s currently found on the site Little London Observationist (LLO).

She posts a lot of her own photos taken while out and about in London, as well as compiling selected images taken from contributors on Flickr, and has also opened up a Food & Drink category wherein she reviews some of London’s eateries.

My reasons for absolutely loving LLO are that for me it’s such a huge slice of home, evoking memories and experiences that are completely different to the way of life that I now live 4k miles away in Florida.  While I enjoy her photos of graffiti, art and random moments, and dearly love her collections of London’s buildings, it’s her shots of its inhabitants that move me the most as they capture the essence of the English and Londoners: from the hipsters, trend-setters and fashionistas to the weird, displaced and simply crazy.

People-watching was always one of the most enjoyable pleasures to engage in during the years I lived in London: either grabbing a coffee and a window seat at one of my boltholes in Muswell Hill or meeting up with friends in the Islington and Shoreditch areas, sitting down outside a cafe or bar and nursing a drink or two while we chatted and watched the world go by.

Here’s a shot I took a few years ago on Holywell Lane in the Shoreditch area.  It’s a huge piece by Ben Flynn aka Eine, a London artist who specialises in the form of letters, and who has got some serious air miles under his belt, leaving his concepts in cities all over the world.

What I find most interesting is that Stephanie is originally from New York and has been living in London since 2007, which leads me to believe that it takes someone who hasn’t been numbed to the sensory experiences that London offers, someone with unfiltered eyes who can accurately capture the visual delights contained within.  When I first moved there I was completely snap-happy with my camera, finding inspiration everywhere, however after a while I took less and less photos.  If you live in London for long enough you can stop noticing the buildings, cityscapes and characters that make up the intrinsic fabric of the city, and with time those unique things can start to fade into the background of daily life and begin to be considered commonplace.

This is why I love LLO as for me it’s like falling in love with London all over again.

Oh, That’s Well Lush

Lush
Definition: Can be used to describe an object which is considered to be above average in either taste, smell, sight or other sensory perceptions
Example: “This cake is lush, I think I’ll eat it all.“

Last year before I left British shores for Florida, I regularly frequented an absolutely wonderful shop called Lush that was opened back in 1994 by husband and wife team Mark & Mo Constantine under the original name of Cosmetic House Limited, offering handmade bath and beauty products.  For whatever reason, in 1995 they changed the name of their shop to Lush and proceeded to conquer the UK.  One of the things that I like about Lush is that they don’t use animals fats in their products, try to use natural ingredients like fruits, vegetables, honey, beeswax and synthetic ingredients where required, and are passionately against animal testing (they perform tests on human volunteers instead).

The main thing that I l❤ve l❤ve l❤ve about Lush is the smell: due to the heavily fragrant content, each of their shops produces a huge amount of amazingly wonderful scent that cheekily escapes the front door and wafts down the road, which means that before you even see the sign you know that there’s a Lush store nearby and, like a smelly Pied Piper, it seductively lures you inside.

While living in London, one of my housemates temporarily worked for the Lush store located on Carnaby Street near Oxford and Regent Street in the central shopping area of London, and although she slowly developed nasal immunity to the sweet smells that bombarded her all day, we used to love it when she came home as the distinctive Lush smell would cling to her for hours.

Although Lush have a great range of products, I wish that there was a way that they could bottle the scent that their shops produce as, personally, it’s addictive and I find it far superior to any of their admittedly great products when sniffed individually.

Even though I couldn’t capture the overall magnificent odour of Lush, I found my favourite product scent and got into the habit of buying a big block of their Rock Star soap.  This soap cuts as smoothly as cheese, so I would divide it up into small pieces and wrap those pieces in little individual muslin bags, then scatter the bags throughout all my cupboards and shoe drawers so that my belongings would become infused with the sweet, vanilla-candy smell of RS.

So when I moved to America I really thought that I would have to forsake many of my home comforts, periodically returning to soggy Britain to stock up on the things that make life bearable (namely chocolate, decent cheese, proper mustard and hugs from my Mum).  However, to my delight it would appear that I won’t have to struggle on without every home comfort.

Lush opened their first store in historic Poole, a town located on the British South coast, and due to a sterling business model, as well as clever marketing and an addictive, quality product range, they’ve done so well that today they can boast over 678 shops in 45 countries.  Go Lush.

Which means that if I travel down to Orlando I have the choice of 2 Lush stores from which to buy as much Rock Star soap as the store stocks/the truck can carry.

Bogdaggingnabbit, I was down in Orlando only a couple of weekends ago and if, instead of wallowing in a sulk about all the things I can’t obtain in America, I had carried out an internet search for Lush in America, I would have known there were multiple Lush stores over here and could have dragged The Hublet into smelly nirvana.

Which means it’s time to plan another long weekend away…

Pegg, Frost & Wright Teaming Up Again For ‘The World’s End’

Good news everybody!  The trio who brought us the cult TV series Spaced, black comedy Shaun of the Dead and spoof action comedy Hot Fuzz are thankfully at it again, recently revealing the basic details of their upcoming film The World’s End, with filming due to begin in September this year with a proposed release date for early in 2013.

Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost will be working together on a comedy, with the official synopsis on Simon Pegg’s site peggster.net being: 20 years after attempting an epic pub crawl, five childhood friends reunite when one of them becomes hell-bent on trying the drinking marathon again. They are convinced to stage an encore by mate Gary King, a 40-year-old man trapped at the cigarette end of his teens, who drags his reluctant pals to their home town and once again attempts to reach the fabled pub, The World’s End. As they attempt to reconcile the past and present, they realize the real struggle is for the future, not just theirs but humankind’s. Reaching The World’s End is the least of their worries.

There’s obviously a lot that’s not being revealed about the plot, but with enough hints being dropped about larger forces at work pursuing their own nefarious schemes, this will no doubt follow the much loved format of a normal bloke going about his normal life and attempting to carry out a normal blokey things while thwarting the forces of evil and saving mankind (or, in Hot Fuzz’s case, the town of Sandford).

The writing duo of Wright and Pegg have had this film in the works for quite some time, with the two always planning to complete what they call their ‘Three Flavours Cornetto Trilogy’, also known as the ‘Blood & Icecream Trilogy’ which makes reference to their running joke about Wright’s belief that Cornetto’s are the perfect cure for a hangover.  Each film is visually connected to a flavour of Cornetto ice cream of a flavour that suits the film, with Shaun of the Dead featuring a red-wrapped strawberry flavoured Cornetto, Hot Fuzz featuring a blue-wrapped vanilla, chocolate & nut Classic flavoured Cornetto and The World’s End to feature…well, us fans have our money on the green-wrapped Mint flavoured Cornetto.

As with a lot of Edgard Wright and Simon Pegg’s work, there’s a lot more going on than meets the eye, with relatively normal things having a far deeper symbolism: their Three Flavours Cornetto trilogy is a reference to the work of Krzysztof Kieślowski’s, a Polish politician and screenwriter who co-wrote Three Colours film trilogy, which was made up of films each named for the colours of the French flag, with plots dealt loosely with the three political ideals of the French Republic motto, which are respectively liberty, equality, and fraternity.

Regardless, I can’t tell you how excited I am that we get to see another writing lovechild from expectant parents Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg, as well as enjoy the almost heavenly comic pairing of Simon Pegg and Nick Frost.

Things That Make Me Cry #14

Onions.  Infernal onions.  I cook with them almost daily as they’re an intrinsic part of how I cook, and each time – each and every time – they manage to draw at least one tear out of me.

The Mothership always advised that before I actually begin cutting my onions for inclusion in a dish I peel my onion and then cut it in half, then quickly run it under cold water, and to some extent this has worked, but I still feel the sting of collecting tears.  And of course the main thing to remember above all else is never NEVER rub your eyes as you will enter a world of pain from which there is no escape.

It was sometimes a lot worse when I wore contact lenses as I stupidly presumed that they would act as superhero goggles and protect me, but as I’m one of those people who invariably rub their eyes at the most inappropriate times I don’t think there are many awkward experiences that can compare to having the evil onion trapped directly on top of your eyes by a layer of plastic.

Why do onions hate us so?

It turns out that the plant group that onions belong to, mingling at family reunions with relatives like garlic, chives and leeks, absorbs sulphur from the soil they grow in, which in turn builds up inside the onions cells.  When we cut an onion open we allow oxygen to interact with the cells, which triggers a chemical reaction that produces a stinging sulphur gas.  This gas reacts with the water in your eyes to form sulphuric acid, which is what causes the pain that we feel.

If you reach up to rub your eyes there’s a chance your fingers are directly carrying some of the onions cells, which will make the problem oh so much worse..

Some of the methods that people claim helps to to prevent the onion from making you cry are:

• Cut the onion under running water.
• Freeze the onion for a few minutes before cutting.
• Cook it before you cut it.
• If the onion’s small enough, don’t cut it but boil instead.
• Allegedly gripping a slice of lemon, a sugar cube or a piece of bread between your teeth works as the food absorbs the gas before it reaches your eyes.
• Use a very sharp knife to cut your onion as it supposedly reduces cell damage, minimising the sulphur gas released.
• Put a metal spoon in the freezer, then take out and hold in your mouth while you’re chopping the onions.
• Chew gum while you’re cutting your onion.
• Wear swimming goggles.

This last one, the swimming goggles, seems like a good idea as you completely protect your eyes and can easily buy a cheap pair of goggles from a Pound Shop (Dollar Store for you, my American brethren), which is why I was amazed to find that a company called RSVP International Inc based out of Seattle are selling via Amazon (although I’m sure other discerning distributors are available) Onion Goggles from $19.95 to $23.50 (free shipping if you order over $25 worth of stuff, otherwise it’s $5.58 for shipping).

I think it’s absolutely amazing that a company actually sells fancy swimming goggles for more than $19 when I can simply go to my local Dollar Tree/Dollar Store/Dollar General/Family Dollar and get enough pairs of cheap swimming goggles to last me the next 10-years for a total of $5.  It just goes to show that there are some people with more money than sense, otherwise RSVP International wouldn’t be marking up their plastic swimming goggles…whoops sorry, I mean their incredibly well researched and unique onion goggles…so ridiculously high.

I end this post with a link to an adorable song from American singer/songwriter Meiko (AKA Meiko Sheppard) called You and Onions Make Me Cry.